The Flies in McNair's Cologne
July 9, 2009

As a football fan I was shocked by the murder of former NFL quarterback Steve McNair, seemingly by his 19-year-old waitress girl-friend--of course, by the time you get this the shooter could be known. But as I write on Monday night, she apparently shot McNair four times--twice in the head and twice in the chest--and then turned the gun on herself, ending her life with a single bullet to the head.

It doesn't surprise me that since his death there have been numerous stories about his on-field heroics. If all you remember is his football career he lived an impressive life: In 116 games, McNair threw for 31,304 yards on 2,733 of 4,544 passing attempts, with 174 touchdowns. He also ran for 3,590 career yards and 37 TDs. He was a three-time Pro Bowl selection and shared the most valuable player of the NFL award in 2003. Yep, that's what his on-field friends are talking about.

But when I read the story of his murder I immediately thought of the words of Solomon in Ecclesiastes 10:1: "As dead flies give perfume a bad smell, so a little folly outweighs wisdom and honor."

All of the heroics of an All Pro player couldn't remove the stink of what McNair did. Not just what happened to him. But what he did to put himself in the position to get murdered. Remember, this was no random drive-by. What was a 36-year-old married man with four children thinking when he got romantically entangled with a 19-year-old waitress? But even more important--and something he apparently gave little thought to before his death--how will his wife and kids remember him? His emotionally shattered wife said she didn't even know he was having an affair. I'm sure the mental and emotional wound she's suffered will never completely heal. And what about his kids? Will they grow up filled with the pride of their dad's accomplishments or the shame of his violent and untimely death? One day they had a dad known for his love for his family and community. The next day they had ... a nightmare.

I repeatedly remind guys that whether it's today, tomorrow, next week, next month, next year, or in a decade--what they do in secret will one day be known. In Proverbs 10:9 Solomon said, "The man of integrity walks securely, but he who takes crooked paths will be found out." And regardless of a man's sweet accomplishments, the secret wrongs of his life, like dead flies, will destroy the cologne of his life. I don't mean to come on so strong here ... no, that's not true.

I do mean to come on strong. Yes, I'm sad for Steve and his girlfriend. But I'm heartbroken when I think of his family. If there is something redeeming that could come from this, maybe it could serve as a wakeup call for anyone out there living a secret life that hasn't caught up with him yet. If it's you, then take some time and reflect on the impact it will have on your family and friends if your secret life suddenly became known. Or even worse, how would it affect them if your hidden life suddenly cost you your health or your life?

If that thought would prompt one man to connect with God in a new and cleansing and life-changing way--then something good could indeed come from something so horrible.